Marketing Ideas From a Leather Clad Vampire Hottie

I have to tell you... there are worse ways to spend a Saturday night than sitting down with a bottle of wine and a bowl of ice-cream and watching a skin-tight-leather-clad Kate Beckinsale dealing death and destruction.

I'm talking, of course, about Underworld 4, the latest film in the Underworld saga. I haven't had the pleasure of seeing 2 and 3 yet, but that didn't make the plot any harder to follow... although "plot" is probably a fairly optimistic way of putting things.

Why?

Because they're all pretty much the same: hot Vampire Chick slays numerous bad-guys and werewolves in various ingenious, inventive and improbable ways, and ends up in a humungous fight scene at the end where she invariably triumphs.

High art, it ain't.

But who cares?

After all, it's entertaining and it doesn't exactly take lot of effort to work out what's going on -- it's Kate Beckinsale in skintight leather.

Need I say more?

But here's a question: how many films like this can Hollywood make before everyone gets bored and stops watching them?

The answer is...

... as many as they please.

Because the public never tires of them and never is going to, because it taps deeply into our human psyche. Like I said: it's Kate Beckinsale in skintight leather.

So... what does this have to do with marketing your business?

Oh, just about everything, that's all.

Because a lot of my clients come to me and ask me to help then write new ads, web-pages and sales letters.

And I ask them why.

The answer?

Because they're bored of them and want something new.

Wrong answer.

It's perfectly valid to be testing new material against existing ads to see if you can improve response; but it's folly to take something that's working and replace it in toto, just because you are bored with it.

The only time to do that is when it's stopped working and is no longer making you money. And since your market will get bored long after you do, you ought to forget about how you feel about your marketing pieces and see what the numbers are telling you (because the numbers cannot lie).

To put it another way... writing your ads to please your own tastes is like Hollywood making a film to please the critics rather than the people who make the whole thing worthwhile: the cinema goers.

So rather than changing things around because you're bored of them, focus instead on putting your existing material in front of more people.

That'll pay you back big time.

Look... marketing success really does not have to be a struggle.

But it can be, if you don't know the easy way to do it. Jon McCulloch is perhaps Europe's top direct response marketing expert (and he's definitely the most irreverent and Non-PC one you'll ever meet).

So if you're feeling brave and you're not easily offended, then feel free to help yourself to his regular marketing tips by email, and a whole heap of free marketing goodies besides.

But be warned: these tips are NOT for shrinking violets or the faint hearted.

They're waiting for you here: http://www.jonmcculloch.com/free-email-tips

Marketing Ideas for Small Business - What Farm Animals Can Teach You About Marketing

Never mind bats in the belfry -- we've got avians in the air-vent.

It seems the external shutters have been broken at some point, and the sneaky starling has made a nest in there.

That's cool. It's rather neat, actually. Kinda brings the tally up -- we've got a hare in the field behind us (with four leverets), a fox who comes wandering by from time to time, and, of course, umpteen bullocks behind and to either side.

But here are a few funny things.

First, Mother Starling. Every time one of us leaves the house or walks towards the house from the gym or the other outbuildings, she rushes out of the nest and flies away from it... but not too fast.

Because she's obviously wanting us to follow her away from her babes. And the daft thing never learns. She never seems to get used to the idea we're no threat. She's just repeating the same old pattern of behaviour and is unable to break out of it.

And the bullocks?

Well... the other day as I left on my cycle ride, they were gathered by the fence running along the lane.

A couple of them saw me coming and gazed uncomprehendingly as bullocks are wont to do.

But most of them were head-down munching away.

And when I shook, rattled and rolled past them?

It startled them into charging away across the field.

Nothing particularly interesting there, right?

Right.

But what IS interesting... the ones who'd already seen me charged away, too. They, like the bird, it seems, are bound by their own programming.

But before you giggle too much and congratulate yourself on your superiority, just ask yourself how many behaviour patterns you're repeating for no good reason, and how many herds are you following just because everyone else is?

The guy who prints my newsletters told me yesterday he's had his best month for FOUR years. My guess is it's partly to do with putting his prices up -- in the middle of a Double Dip recession - after I told him that was the quickest and easiest way to increase his cashflow (and didn't anyone ever tell you increasing your prices is a genuine marketing strategy, because it sends a very clear message to your market?).

No dumbass herd-following there, Thank Glub.

And as with the clients I spoke to last week, it's no One Big Thing he can put his pinkie on, but whatever it is... it really IS.

I reckon... every month you're NOT following your own direction and instead are following all the other business owners out there... you're probably losing money. And that's not a claim I make lightly.

Earl Nightingale once said, "If you're in a situation and you don't have any clear way forward and want for clear advice, look around and see what everyone else is doing and do the opposite"

Sound advice.

So give it a whirl, and prove it to yourself.

I dare you.

Look... marketing success really does not have to be a struggle.

But it can be, if you don't know the easy way to do it. Jon McCulloch is perhaps Europe's top direct response marketing expert (and he's definitely the most irreverent and Non-PC one you'll ever meet).

So if you're feeling brave and you're not easily offended, then feel free to help yourself to his regular marketing tips by email, and a whole heap of free marketing goodies besides.

But be warned: these tips are NOT for shrinking violets or the faint hearted.

They're waiting for you here: http://www.jonmcculloch.com/free-email-tips